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Can You Save Your Relationship If Your Ex Doesn't Want To?

In an ideal situation, when the relationship deteriorates you'd want to visit some type of relationship counselor. You'd both have an opportunity to discuss and vent the problems that are ruining your relationship.

The therapist would act as a neutral party, not necessarily pointing out who's right and who's wrong, they just want to steer couples towards a solution.

Unfortunately, most relationships don't fit into an ideal problem solving environment. A large percentage of breakups end on bad terms, where one of you doesn't want to discuss the problem.

It's nearly impossible to convince your ex to visit a relationship counselor if they don't want to get back together.

So, is that the end of your relationship? Not if you don't want it to be. You do have a choice.

You can accept their decision and allow the breakup to reach a definite end of the relationship. Or you can take steps to re-open communication and resolve the underlying problems that caused the breakup.

If you're in a situation where your ex is extremely defensive and shows no interest in talking about solutions, you need to take a measured approach.

You can't just directly tell them "let's get back together". You have to take one step at a time. First, get them talking again. Without anger or negative expectations.

Open a new dialogue without pressing for a reconciliation. Then use that renewed communication to resolve the core issues.

The Magic Of Making Up offers a well thought out plan with steps to rebuild your communication and remove anger or tension. It's important to follow the recommended progression, and not jump straight to the "get back together tactics".

You need to fix the lines of communication with the "opening letter" then allow your relationship to go through a healing period before advancing to the "get back together tactics".

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